Nearby a bubble.

Bad lands. The Bad Lands. Albert Bosch called the Bad Lands home. He lived there. That’s right, lived there. “Why in olden times” he would say “I didn’t used to live there at all so I never called it home, like”. A little tune would play. Deee deee deet. The car revved. Imagine a post apocalyptic world and the sort of vehicle that you would get there. Like a dune buggy with mesh on it, bits of rag and water bottles. It was nothing like that. A 1970’s New York yellow cab with a dome for a passenger cabin. Albert was at the wheel or the wheel was at Albert. It was hard to tell with these new fangled cars. The radio was permanently tuned to Radio Wool.

Three red folders looking out of the window. What are they thinking? What is their purpose? The purpose is to reflect light,minutely, not so you’d notice. Even if you were looking.

I am Sam the soldier and I strut about the place and sometimes I stand up straight. It’s tradition. Under my uniform I wear a t-shirt that says “Breakdancer”. I’m not a breakdancer, I just liked the t-shirt. I am not interested in breakdancing. I wish people would stop asking me about it. It’s just a t-shirt. I don’t ask them if they are into Nike. I have nothing against breakdancing.

The chair loomed into view once again. Albert gunned the throttle, he had no other choice. His nerves jangled. The keys in the ignition jangled. The chair sat. Oooh I like that! The Chair sat. Ha! I am rather pleased with myself.

A big map of Britain. I pointed to a place at random. Chichingsshire. I departed at once. I returned quickly to plan out the journey more carefully. Studying the map I found that I lived in Chichingsshire. I sat in my easy chair and chilled out. It was easy. I began to think that I could make a career for myself. But who would pay me? No-one probably. Some-ones always got to spoil it.

Charlie Bridle, huddled against the sharp wind and rain. He felt the side of his face going numb. He couldn’t turn his head another way because the wind would catch his hat. He couldn’t hold his hat because his hands were in his pockets. He couldn’t take his hands out of his pockets because he was an android cyborg robot and was programmed to keep his hands in his pockets. He lurched towards an immovable looking chair. It didn’t move. Nearby a bubble dome car revved it’s jet engine. Next to the car was a garden shed. The door opened a crack then opened fully. A handsome athletic man galloped elegantly away and dove majestically behind a rock. Seconds later he was peering furtively from behind the boulder. The robot smashed the chair with its big clomping feet.

The hair-cut was grand. The barber flicked the hair from his neck with a little brush. Where do you buy these brushes? The barbers shop was left far behind. The hair cut made him feel lighter. It started to rain and a cold wind whipped up. His head felt really cold. By the time he got home he had a serious sniffle. He’d have to buy a hat. One of those woolly skull caps that burglars wear.

Brain, brain, brain, brain. Brain hummmmmm. The electronic brain. A dream for all humanity. The scientist so close to realising this dream but possibly aeons away worked eagerly with bunsen burners. There was a discovery waiting to be discovered. This discovery would be called “infix outfox cacti relation” were it ever discovered. The laws laid down by Albert Bosch regarding initial rules for the artificial brain read; 1. Never, ever, immerse the artificial brain in water. 2. Switch on brain using the “brain on” switch. 3. Do not use brain during lightening storm. 4. Do not use the brain as a radio, instead buy a radio. 5. During settling in process do no use a pogo stick.

Ink. The Thermos Detect Allure Theory of Ink. Compression must be between 10 and 15%. Lower compression will cause ink to codify. Higher compression will create creptation. In between will be aaaaaall right. Test specimens should be black ink. Blue ink can give varying results. Ink will derek by 8% over a period of 15 weeks. Paper should be 150msg. Draw a picture of a horse. Then a picture of a house with a happy man at the window. Imagine the man is happy because the sun is shining and the flowers are blooming. Ignore the fact that you are rubbish at drawing houses and the windows are in unlikely places.

Some people go on and on and on and on about things. Why can’t they just shut up? I would like to take them to the side, presuming they are not to the side already. If they are already to the side I will take them to the centre and have a quiet word with them. Shoosh.

Willingborough in the West Midlands is a lovely spot. The A987 runs through it like a stream through a meadow. Butterflies are in abundance.

Wall, why are you so tall?

I don’t care what the weatherman says because I live in a bio-dome. Inside the bio-dome is fantastic and I can do lots of thinks like looking out of the windows and looking at plants. Of course it’s not all roses. One day I threw a stone. I wasn’t supposed to but I did and a very important man glared at me. I acted nonchalant. I was very upset even though I hadn’t broken anything. I wish I’d thrown another stone at the important man now. To see his surprised face would fill me with glee!

Goog tok "For the th M. program."

Bar is a bar, code is a hot Topic by the end of the World For a Fiver: guest list guests at did did,
Did did you ever think of me by NICK Lachey,
I am tired of being Alone by Al Green,
Released CALL ME in the Morning.
A2 Simple Way to get The Most Out of Your own Step- By- step guide to building a Better High school and AYP Status.
For the th M. program.

Poem Wonker2

The hill to run to the bottom really calm puppy,
Quickly which to go as from the pistons your small legs are.
That falls being,
Not to reinforce however and align.

Poem Wonker1

Can't we believe in the wind under our feet?
It precipitates, precipitates to precipitate and,
As a horse incredibly fast that which is late for a meeting,
And an important great man there that which can be impressed is.

Woob

Woob is an amazing substance. You can hammer a nail in to it or hammer it with a hammer. The only down side is the cost. About 50 persnacks per square meter. I buy mine at B and Q because I like their adverts on the telly. However their store is terrible, the floors are unclean, the shelves disorganised, some of the shelving looks like it were put oop by a mooontain lion. I was going to put an exclamation point after the word lion but I decided not to!

Last week I bought a thousand square metres of woob. I hammered nails into it using a hammer. I then hung my coat up on my lovely new coat hanger.

Space, there’s a funny thing now, it is neither up nor down. I prefer to say nup nor down. Space is very similar to the moustachioed gent, the Grand Old Duke of York. A spelling error had that as The Grand Old Duck of York. A common fallacy about the Grand Old Duke of York is that he had 10,000 men. He really had 8 men. One was called Larry. Another was called Harry. Surprisingly there was no Barry. There was a Xarrinko from Barrinko. Back to the list, another guy was called Guy. Another guy was called Warpo. Another guy had a really interesting name, that name was Alagrano Granalago, to make it easier for the others he shortened it to Alagrano Granalag. There was this other bloke called Deemer. He was nothing to do with The Grand Old Duke of Yorks men but I thought I should mention him.

I could tell that the lady didn’t like me because of her severe hair cut. It weren’t quite man hair but was close enough. She had a severe man face and wore mens clothing. Her name was either Sam, Chris, Lesley or Jamie. I can’t remember which ooh oooh oooh I remember what it was now.

Horses eh? I am slightly scared of them. Especially when they dress up as g-g-g-g-ghosts and leap out at you and say “WOOOOOH” in a wibbly wobbly shakey voice. Horses have hooves. That’s a known fact. What isn’t a know fact is ……

Horses eh? Horses for courses. Does that saying refer to a course of medication? I don’t really understand. Booohooohooo, woooohoooohooo abble abble.

A fantastic world, with giant buildings that are robots. They are totally independent. You could go to work and come home to find that your robot house has wandered off! There would be a big space where it used to be or there could be another robot building in it’s place. If you weren’t paying attention you could walk into someone elses house. You would think that would be embarrassing but on this planet they do not know the word “embarrassed”. They know the word “EeeeekBalleeee” which roughly translated means embarrassed, or beans, depending on which dialect you use.

Barping, that is the name of the world that I was just talking about. It is part of a binary system or something. There is a quasar nearby. It lights up the sky like a quasar should and makes all the people and adibals act odd. Adibal is their word for animal. Adibals live in houses sometimes and people live on farms and in zoos. Then a big important man with a twirly moustache blows a whistle and honks a hooter and the people and adibals swap round. This can sometimes be inconvenient and cause arguments to arise, generally though it all goes surprisingly smoothly.

Confusion, now there’s something that happens. They say that the universe is a big bundle of confusion. Scientists have recently discovered a new element which they have named fonfusion. So the universe is a big bundle of confusion and fonfusion. There is a small area in the Alpha Quadrant in Star Trek that is all fonfusion. This area is known as the Tree Zone and nobody goes there except for Alan.

Alan is a scientist oh yeah! A scientist and-he-has-spiky-hair.

I need the recipe of chicken tikka filling for sandwiches. I have searched the internooot but can only find places that sell chicken tikka sandwiches or sell filling for chicken tikka sandwiches. I would also like to know how Chinese takeaways make the gravy for their chips and gravy. It’s tasty. Now and again you get a bizarre Chinese takeaway that just uses Bisto! That’s always disheartening and leads me to believe that a European is doing the cooking.

I fly high like a rocket in the sky, this is because I am a rocket.

I sit inside a garden shed, it is dark (meaning there is darkness, I don’t mean the shed is dark. The shed is a rustic red colour and quite jaunty). There are noises outside the shed. I can’t quite make out what it is at first. I eventually recognise the noise as a jet engine. I decide that a garden shed isn’t the best place to be when a jet engine is so close. I open the door a crack, I see nothing. I fling open the door and make a run for it.

Who knows what it’s all about? Nobody I would think. It’s not about anything. That’s what I presume anyway. Folk are just reading too much in to it, as per usual.

Olive, khaki, green, brown, fawn (faun?), these are all colours. Some people use those colours in things that they make. Ferrari is not a big fan of these colours. They like red. At interviews’ prospective employees are tested for their reaction to the colour red. That’s why you don’t get many bulls working at Ferrari.

Monkery

Coat hooks. Put them up on the wall. Don’t put coats on them all. Leave a few spaces. Throw coats in the cupboard.
Sad End. A depressing place to live. The sun never shone, everyone was grey. The talk was of how miserable everything was. All conversations were of a pessimistic nature. One day, a small child planted some flower seeds. Several weeks later they bloomed into the most beautiful, colourful display. It didn’t make a jot of difference.
Driving the van was excellent. His arm was out of the window, the radio tuned to Radio Jolly. He had one more delivery to make and it was only 2:30. He would be home by 3.

The rain poured down. At some point it was bound to stop. Tin roof. Harry didn’t have a tin roof. He had a putting green in his living room. It was gnarly. But not nearly gnarly enough. He would build a ramp at each end and ramp over the green on his BMX. Radical.

The Russion space station was as big as 10 football fields. Vladimir Vodak quite liked being onboard, sometimes he would look out of the porthole into the black, deadly, empty void. Sometimes he wished that someone would swim past the window and this thought made him laugh. Doktor Vadlinky watched Vladimir on the tele/audio system. Vlad was laughing to himself again and looking into space. Should he put sedatives into the guys’ food? Was that moral? Moral? What WAS moral? If they said anything he would sedate them all and then eject them into space, hahahaha.

Ramlinov read Vadlinky’s report about Vodak’s behaviour “space madness”. “Sounds like space madness to me”

The supermarket had a lot of tins in it. Bang would like to try and steal some tins by making a specially converted trolley. He knew he would need mirrors, magnets and a grabbing arm but other than that the plan was not fully formed. He purchased a mig welder as he felt sure he would need one of those. He didn’t have a welding mask but was sure that a balaclava would do instead.

How can anyone stand to walk in the rain? It’s ghastly!
“Crikey Bongos!” Cried Artisan Chope “that’s the 14^th time that Bangly Ongo has leapt off the bridge into the river. He’s a bridge jumpin’ nut.
The blue shirt was quite nice. He picked it out himself. There was a blue one, a green one and an orange one and he picked the blue one. He would wear the orange one tomorrow.

Where in the world can you get such a service huh? Huh? Only a here.
The time has come to write the final chapter of this tribute to Monkery. To sum up; Monkery was a big pile of rubbish. It never existed and even if it did I couldn’t care less about it.
To sum up; Monkery was one of THE best things about living in the 18^th Century. Monkery was bright. Monkery was cheerfull, Monkery was forward thinking, Monkery was efficient.
Sunning myself on top of a city building on a scorching hot day was pleasant. The smell of melting tar was the smell track for the summer.

The argument continued. Should they go to Morocco or carry on to Italy.

Parnaby

Water water every bear and dot a dot to dink, comma.